I won’t be doing that again for awhile.

Today was an interesting day and it was a day of contrasts. I say a day of contrasts because it was one of those days where a couple of things happened and in retrospect they were all quite telling.

The last few weeks, I’ve remained somewhat low-key. I get stuff done but, I don’t push it. I simply can’t because I get tired a little easier than I would normally. It doesn’t mean I don’t try to get stuff done but, I understand my body is still very much in the midst of the recovery process.

Now, I’m three plus weeks out from my accident (actually 25 days). Most of my bruises are healed. The scraping on my arm is just about gone, the bruises on my knees almost gone as well, the stitches are out, the swelling gone, black and blue gone. Another week and anything at all in terms of skin should pretty much be healed over. In less than a week my cast comes off too (hopefully)!

Just because the cast comes off doesn’t mean everything will be okay with the leg but at least I’ll be able to start strengthening it again. My ribs hurt still (and at the strangest times).

However, I’ve pretty much come through it all without much of a bump. There’s been a slew of stuff I had to take care off and while I’m not making the progress I would like to make in terms of speed I am making progress.

The best thing in all of this?

I didn’t put the weight on that I lost over the last few months. Even better still, I had to go to the doctor today and the way things are looking I am coming off the two blood pressure medications I’ve been on the last few years! So, I’m very happy about that. This is something I’ve been working towards for awhile and I want to keep that momentum going forward. The less pills I have to take the better off I am because in means I’m keeping my body healthy through diet and exercise. I’m still struggling with modifying both but I’m getting there and I’m very happy about it. So that was the great news of the day.

The bad news was of course I was told I am headed for eternal damnation by a friend of mine. I could probably be a little more worried under different circumstances (like it coming directly from whatever higher power makes those kinds of determinations) but, it’s always interesting to hear someone pass judgment on you so readily. It’s even more interesting when the person doing it ignores others in their close circle who are rife with “sin.” Like the close friend of the man opining on my final destination, the close friend who frequented prostitutes for decades right up to the day he started going out with his current wife (something he obviously does not broadcast). The same close friend who has remained unemployed for years living like a leech off this woman.

I guess we are measured sometimes with an uneven ruler and what applies to one doesn’t apply to the other. It is telling though and means I take those words with a grain of salt.

I can sit through a lot actually. During the same conversation I was told of a nearby convent that stood atop the unmarked graves of countless killed in the womb babies – I kid you not. When you hear that kind of thing, how can you respond?

Sometimes, I think how much impact our words have. Even I am not aware of this (although I worry at great length about it) and lob the occasional missile forth doing untold damage and once that damage is done, a simple sorry won’t heal things over.

I don’t generally like to talk about certain things.

Maybe, I should qualify that. I like to talk about things and I like the space to disagree but at the same time to have a dialog you’ve got to be willing to see the validity of the other side and there are many times I get the sense there is room for only one opinion in the discussion and it isn’t mine so I shut down. It may not be apparent but I do it nonetheless and as I walk away I am saddened by it. How much can you take to heart and how much can you steel yourself against and allow to roll over or pass through you?

I don’t talk about religion because people do crazy things in God‘s name. People say crazy things in God’s name but often it really doesn’t seem to me as if it’s God at all these people talk about, more their own screwed up view of the world. I keep having this image of God (like right out of the Sistine Chapel thingy) with God sitting on some kind of stone throne and just cringing looking down at our planet because we f*%& it up so often and we attribute our screw-ups to Him.

Anyway, I was condemned today... well you know what I’ve heard? Hell’s really not so bad because it’s a DRY HEAT.